I started back to the gym. I’d left off for a bit when I started my new (horrible) job.  My schedule is brutal and it was hard to find the time.  I bought an exercise bike and some weights for home and I’ve dragged my ass to the gym too.  Even with my pretty strict ketogenic (awful…kill me) diet, I’d hit a bit of a plateau and I was just maintaining my weight. So I’m working out again. Yay.

I may have mentioned I’m lazy, like really lazy.  Once I sit down after work it’s really hard to make myself go out again. Add to that I don’t really like people.  I mean they’re okay but I work in retail. I see enough people every damn day that all I really want is to be away from them.  It’s weird…I love humanity but individual people…ehhhhh.  Maybe it’s because I deal with people when they’re generally disappointed and angry that I’m ambivalent about them. So it’s hard to go outside, that’s where the people are.

But I’ve managed to get to the gym twice this week and I worked out at home once as well.  Get back on that horse!  I’m in far better shape than I was before my heart attack/blood clot/veins tried to kill me thing but I have work to do. I’m a big fat fatty.  People hate it when I say that.  “Oh no, you’re not! Don’t say that! You’re just big.” Uhhh yeah, big and fat.  The thing is I’m not disparaging myself, it’s a fact.  I’m not judging myself.  I’m not a bad person because I’m overweight.  I’m wonderful and chicks dig me.  I’m not trying to lose weight to look better.  I’m damn cute as I am right now. Remember, you have to watch out for the cute ones.

I want to be healthier, that’s all.  Almost dying has a way of getting your attention.  Being really sick does too.  I was barely able to take care of myself.  I was very very sick and I live alone.  Chronic illness is not something I want in my life.  That was a really huge wake-up call. I need to get healthier to minimize the risk of that sort of thing happening again.  I know, I’m getting older shit’s going to happen.  Knowing that it really makes it so much more important that I work on this.  I’m in the best shape right now of my adult life, and I hope that just keeps improving.